Heart Made Whole

This weekend I had a “He restores my soul” encounter. The Father’s heart towards me is one of an unashamed, unreserved and unrestrained love. What I experienced this weekend was the very thing I’ve been longing for (and in some moments I complained about it #transparency).

I have been feeling so insecure, so weary in so many areas of my life. I’ve been holding onto a particular area where I was hurt and was slowly building a wall around my wounded heart. Instead of dealing with the hurt – I’ve just been covering it up. As much as I know that letting things go is sometimes the best thing to do – it’s not always the easiest. I was keeping the hurt alive by not dealing with it and letting it go and trusting God to heal my heart.

I’m one of those people who want all questions answered but I will also settle for the person owning the mistake. It really takes a lot to push me to that final straw. But I’ve been feeling like I’ve been in that place of “hanging on by a thread” for months now. Feeling this way has just been sapping me of my joy and strength. It was consuming my thoughts day and night. I was even feeling like I’m this horrible person for feeling this way and felt like God wasn’t hearing my hearts cry. I was probably not listening to Him because I was so caught up in my pity party. 

I took a chance this weekend but my actions were intentional. I went to let Him restore my soul. I went to a place where no one knew me. I went to lay it all out before God. I at first felt afraid to be transparent. But as I surrendered my heart to His love…God more than met me half way. It felt like He reached down and embraced me. Instead of feeling guilt and shame over how my heart was, I felt this relief as I lay it all out before Him. I cried. I laughed. I sang. I danced. I sat and listened to Him speaking to me as the ministry happened. I felt set up. Like the Word being ministered was just for me – and it was! 

As the worship team sang, God got my attention with the one line: Your love is proud to be seen with me. Wow! The tears ran like rivers down my cheeks. I didn’t even bother to wipe them away. I didn’t bother how I looked to others around me. I just let God take my heart and heal it. 

God isn’t embarrassed by my failure. God isn’t embarrassed by my situation. God isn’t embarrassed by my insecurities. God isn’t embarrassed by the fact that I lost it this week. God isn’t embarrassed by my hurt. God isn’t embarrassed to lavish His love on me even when I feel like I’m not worthy. God’s love is PROUD to be seen with me, to embrace my life – even the parts I feel are ugly. God loves even the ugly part of me. God loves YOU in the same way. 

I had been running away from the person whose love was my solution because I wasn’t “perfect or together” enough. The freedom I found as I was emerced in His perfect love has washed away all the fear, doubt and hurt that once bound my heart. 

Don’t be afraid to let God see and touch the parts of your heart that are hurt, scared, insecure or ugly. His love is bigger than anything you can put before Him. When you let God heal your heart – He does it to the point that it is restored. 

I know that over the next few months there will be moments where I will have to choose whether to keep my heart surrendered to His love or expose my heart once again to the hurt, fear, insecurity and other negative things. I have the choice to forgive and release. God will give me the grace and strength but it is my choice what I allow myself to think and follow.

If you are in a place where you need to let your heart be made whole, I want to encourage you to lay it all out before God. His love is stronger and bigger than what your holding on to. Let God heal your heart to the place of restoration. 

Let God’s love make your heart whole again.

Keep living with passion, courage and boldness.

From my heart to yours

Taryn❤️

Stillness {Tune In}

Have you ever had that moment where you looked at the date and thought, “Wow! Time has flown this year. Look what month it is already?”. I have this moment over and over again. I have realised that sometimes weeks pass by and I can’t really tell you what I have been doing, except to say “It’s been busy”.

Jeremy and I recently spoke about the day to day hustle and bustle which leaves one continuously glued to a phone, computer or television. Computers, phones and televisions – these things all keep us linked to the outside. They are also great stealers of time. We started to realise just how little time we actually spent together – as in our attention was not pulled in 4 or 5 other directions. So we decided to finish up our study and then make our bedroom a “tech-free” zone (as much as is possible). This means we spend time in the Word, reading or playing board/card games and catching up on how we really are. We limit our use of phones and laptops in the evening and try to keep technology out of the bedroom. Occasionally we will watch something and then head to bed.

Well, this week as I reading in the study, Jeremy mentioned how great it is not to be surrounded with all the noise and distractions. I couldn’t agree more! As I sat at my desk (we’re currently writing out Proverbs together), I took notice of how I have really enjoyed spending time in the Word and with my hubby. Mornings are particularly busy – so evenings are working for us when it comes to reading and studying the Word.

God began speaking to me about “stillness”. When last had I really become still in His presence? It isn’t so much about how much I pray and read the Word as it is sometimes about me hearing from God. Don’t get me wrong, you need to be reading the Word and praying, but also hearing from God. God speaks – and He isn’t going to yell and scream and nag – like us natural people are used to.

I read the story of Mary and Martha (Luke 10:38-42). I started to see myself as Martha – busy and running around. Maybe not in a physical way, but in my heart and mind, I know even when I’m reading the Word, my mind is distracted with worries, concerns, plans and other stuff. Why had I not put this aside and sat – still – in God’s presence? Surely God knows about the things that are happening – and maybe instead of me speaking, if I’d listen – I would have heard what He wanted to say to me through His Word about the situations. As I became quiet and allowed Him to speak, there was peace. Everything I needed was right there in His Word and His presence.

“Be still and know that I am God…” – Psalm 48:10

Be still – The word used here – râphâh – means properly to cast down; to let fall; to let hang down; then, to be relaxed, slackened, especially the hands: It is also employed in the sense of not making an effort; not putting forth exertion; and then would express the idea of leaving matters with God, or of being without anxiety about the issue.

Well this was a wake up call. How often do I ask God to take of something and before I have even said ‘amen’ – I pick up the very thing I have just ask Him to take care of up again. Sometimes my own impatience gets in the way of my miracle as I try and make a solution happen. 

Learning to declutter your heart, mind and life is so important. Learning to be “still” is not learning to be “lazy”. We all need to look after ourselves wholisticly. Don’t waste your strength on always trying to correct things and making them happen. Learn to let God be God. For God to release what’s in His hand – you need to let go of what’s in your hand. 

Learn to converse with God with the intent of hearing Him talk back not only to hear your own voice. God will speak to you through your day and use the things we so easily overlook because we are too busy/distracted to notice.

So take time to find a moment in your day to be still. To listen. To hear.

Keep living boldly and passionately!

From my heart to yours

Taryn

Sibling Love – Part 2 {My Favorite Sister}

Natalie is the reason I have a blog! My first post was about her, so clearly she is my favourite sister😜.

My first blog post on Truly Tazz – 2014

Natalie and I are 6 years apart. We shared a room but have never been the “huggy” and all over each other type of sisters. In fact if we perhaps happen to buy the same thing, we would make sure we NEVER wear it at the same time (and we are still like that). Thank goodness our taste in clothes differs. We like to call this a “healthy respect”.

Natalie and I were not as close as we are now, when we were growing up. Natalie is a lot more lively and outgoing than I am and enjoyed hanging out with Gareth. They are two peas in a pod. She has always been the type of person to get exactly what she wants – and this drive in her has made her into a wonderfully successful young adult. She is a no nonsense type of person and we call her the “lawyer” in the family. She is a master negotiator.

Here are some quick and fun facts about her:

  1. She was the first to leave home – as in leave South Africa all together.
  2. She lives in Dubai and works for the airline Emirates. She travels the world for a living while serving people (each job has a down side😝). AND she recently got a promotion (Congrats Natalie 😘)
  3. Natalie HATES incompetence (so do the rest of us).
  4. She has this fascination with pandas (as in the fluffy black and white bear-type animal).
  5. Despite being a “tom-boy” growing up – she is way girlier than I am and is more modern in her fashion etc.
  6. She can get anyone to listen to her (I’m not sure if it’s because of her persuasion skills or charming personality😜)
  7. She can get my dad to do what the rest of us in the family term “impossible” – see point 6!
  8. Don’t be fooled by her pretty looks, she will sort you out if necessary. I have seen her wrestle my brothers and tell people off.
  9. She can cry on cue (ask any of my dad’s staff who have tested this when she was younger – they all got into trouble).
  10. Due to all her travels she has this Australian/European/American mixed accent.

Now for some special memories and things I love about her:

Natalie in her full Emirates uniform .

Natalie really wanted to go into physiotherapy after school. However, university wasn’t where she ended up. After her applications were unsuccessful, she began to research working overseas. She decided to leave home, her first time out of the country and away from home, and move to Dubai. It was a grueling process to be selected and join Emirates and an even tougher training period. She was determined to get her wings. She has now been in Dubai for two years. She was fearless and brave (although at times she didn’t feel like it) when it came to stepping out into the unknown and pursuing her dream. She has seen more of the world in two years than most people will in their lifetime. And I am proud to say she recently received a promotion to work in Business Class – so proud of her🎉.

Nati & I at my wedding. 21 February 2015

Natalie was my maid of honor at my wedding. However due to her working overseas, she was not able to be around for all the important parts such as the dress fitting and my bridal shower. However, she made sure to keep in contact and bought me the most beautiful gifts for my bridal shower which she gave to me just before my wedding. She always manages to keep in touch even though her schedule is crazy and she is in at least 2 different countries a week.

At our sister photoshoot – 2013

One of my favorite times with her was when we did a photo shoot just before she left for Dubai. Suddenly we stood there and realized – yes we were sisters but we had become friends. We enjoyed so many late night talks and laughter as we had both matured. We still talk about everything. But only when we “need” to. I love how our relationship let’s us be ourselves. She will text me with some question and I know – she secretly needs my help or just someone to talk to. And I do the same. Sometimes we don’t talk “face to face” for six weeks and then we will Skype and talk for 2 hours.

At my Grade 2 Awards Evening –

A real special moment for me was when Natalie said she had wanted to be like me. And I was totally shocked! I’ve always been the bossy big sister (which just means I cared a lot) – no one likes to be told what to do. But as we spoke, we both admired each other’s strengths. We both had insecurities and yet what seemed so bad to the one was what the other admired. For example, I always wanted to be thinner and sportier and overall bolder like Natalie. We quietly admired each other. Now we will tell each other upfront. And now that she travels the world – I so want to be like her!! I get a little bit jealous when I see her pictures.

When Natalie visited me in February this year – 2016

Natalie has always been my role model when it comes to someone being perseverant. She doesn’t give up! She sets her sights on a goal and pursues it passionately.

I miss my sister so much. It’s odd to think, that I have only seen and spent time with her twice in 12 months. We might not have a “Brady Bunch” type of relationship, but I know if I ever needed her, she is there – the same goes for if she needs me. I love how we can now have heart to heart chats about the things we are going through.

❤️ Taryn

Going To Get Through

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, Nor shall the flame scorch you. Isaiah 43:2

As we were in church on Sunday, I was asking God for some encouragement. The last 3 weeks have been plagued with health issues. I feel J and I are like those blow up toys with the weighted bottom, that kids knock down and they pop up again. Except it feel like there is a puncture in ours and we can’t bounce back as quickly or get all the way up any more.

God never promised me that while I am here on earth that everything would be a bed of roses. But He did promise to be with me always. He promised that I would not be overcome and overwhelmed. At times it is so difficult to stand and believe. There are moments when all I want to do is hide and cry.

In this season where things are tough, I have been amazed at the stupid things people say. I have heard everything from “God put you two in this situation to teach you something”, to “God must have some awesome plan with your life, so He is making a testimony through Jeremy’s suffering”. I mean…really?! God isn’t standing over me and thinking, “Why can’t she/he keep it together?” or “You will be tougher and stronger after this”. God is on my side. He already fought on my behalf and completed the work on the cross. It isn’t my job to strive and fight. It is my job to believe. And when I am having a moment where my emotions are seeping through my eyes and my heart is heavy, He is right there. His arms of love and grace are open.

He said He will be with me. As I read Isaiah 43:2, those words rang over and over in my heart. God is with me. No matter what I go through in life, He is there and getting me through. His hand is strong to save me, to lift me up. He covers me with His wings. He is my sheild. He is my fortress.

It is in this season that I am truly finding out what it means to abide in the secret place (Psalm 91). Psalm 23 and Psalm 91 have become a reality in our lives. There are so many times where I know the situation with Jeremy should have ended differently and in tragedy, but God has not left us. He has carried us and taken us through the valley. He will continue to do it over and over again.

Keep standing. Keep believing. Keep holding on. The promises of God bring hope. And hope anchors you.

Keep livning life courageously and boldly!

From my heart to your

Taryn

P.S. Below I have added links to AWESOME worship songs which have encouraged me in the tough times. Worship keeps your heart focused on God and His promise.

My Anchor by Christy Nockles

Every Moment by ForeverJones

You Don’t Miss A Thing by Amanda Cook

Sibling Love – Part 1

I am blessed to have three amazing siblings. I am so glad my parents decided that raising me to be an only child wasn’t the plan. Although I mean, some of the benefits of being an only child occasionally crossed my mind, especially since I am the eldest!😜 But nothing beats the organized chaos of siblings. The belly aching laughter and endless hours of fun made for an awesome childhood for all of us.

Since there are four of us, my parents had their hands full. Even now, with all of us (well nearly all of us – Nathan is nearly at the 20 year mark) being adults when we are all home, there is an abundance of laughter and wrestling that takes place. My sister and I are both out of the house. My brothers are still at home. We are all pretty close in our own ways, although I’m sure my three younger siblings were supposed to be born as triplets. They have some pretty special “insider” communication skills which I don’t possess. They can speak an entire conversation only using movie lines and I’m pretty much a lost cause in this area.

In chronological order, it’s me, then Gareth, then Natalie and the tallest of the lot – Nathan. If we were to go in height order, I would be last.

So first up is my brother Gareth…

Gareth and I after church – 2014


He is three years younger than me and we are TOTAL opposites. I was pretty calm and quiet and then Gareth made his appearance and is so full of life and energy. I am very serious and Gareth has the best sense of humor. I am into books and enjoy studying…Gareth on the other hand is excellent at all things creative. I mean, I might have one good idea in 365 days, but Gareth can have 365 good ideas in one day.

He is my special sibling because he was the first to make me a sister (so don’t thing I’m using the word ‘special’ in any sarcastic way). He is a beautiful person. He is caring and so deep…there is nothing shallow about him. He has this warm personality but don’t try your luck when it comes to people he cares about. He is a great lover of people and situations being fair and isn’t afraid to speak up if he feels it isn’t so. He is passionate about what he loves and has the awesome ability to speak and connect with any one, no matter their age, race or standing in life. Gareth is very affectionate and enjoys letting everyone in the family know – he is the best gift giver – from thoughtful to humorous gifts. We might not speak as often as we can or should, but when we do, I am normally falling off my chair with laughter or tearing up because of his thoughtfulness. Gareth is one of those people who once he has a place in your heart and you in his, it’s going to be one awesome and adventurous friendship/relationship.

Here are some things that I love about him:

As far back as I can remember, Gareth has always loved to be daring and try new things. His ability to use his imagination and come up with things made for a rather awesome play time from building with Lego to building a tree house. I loved how he had the ability to do things differently and without fear. As young kids, I often remember him saying. “Come on Taryn, let’s do this”. Being the oldest child, I was always looking out for what might go wrong and took it very seriously that he was “my responsibility”. Yet Gareth would always wanted me to do the daring things with him and if he had not encouraged me to try, I probably would never have done it.

Our grandparents (my mom’s parents) with Gareth (red shirt), myself and my cousin Ryan. 1991

Gareth has this sense of humor which will leave you crying because you have laughed so much. Although while growing up, we didn’t see eye to eye, especially in our teen years. he has this way of cracking a joke that it is hard to stay upset with him. He often teases us (I often got upset – yet it’s what I miss most about him). My parents would put us in what would be known as “time-out” nowadays if we fought with each other as kids. I would be sitting still to avoid getting a hiding (a good ol’ hiding did us good as kids). But Gareth, he was still for long and eventually the boredom would get to him and he would start drumming or doing something. We would end up laughing and best of friends within a few minutes. This was the same for all of us.

Sunset selfie – 2014

Gareth is a great encourager. He can easily motivate someone to do something…obviously he has learnt to use this in a balanced way. People are drawn to his warm personality and he has the ability to connect with them. Because he is such a genuine person, it is easy for him to look past the superficial and see the real person. Gareth runs his own drumming school and he has so many students whose lives have changed as he has encouraged them in their drumming and this has run over into the other things they do. Because Gareth has faced much criticism, especially growing up, he knows what it is to feel pushed aside and so he makes everyone he meets feel special and like they can be the best.

Making my dad into our horse.

Gareth is not the type of guy to be put in a box or within four walls. He would go crazy. This meant school and the traditional way of finding out what to do in life was a challenge for Gareth. The sad thing is, those who were supposed to support him and my parents is this phase, were anything but that. Many people doubted if he would find his place. They often criticized him and my parents. People often misunderstand his creative way of thinking – and believe me if only people would action on his ideas, there is such greatness in them. This created some tensions as he grew up. It wasn’t always easy for him BUT he is such a go-getter. Once he found his place, he ran with it. He is an accomplished drummer and now runs his own drumming school. He is also a graphic designer and has designed for well-known DJs overseas. He helped me put together the invites and wedding day programs for the my wedding. He is so talented and extremely creative. I am proud of him for sticking it out, discovering what he loves to do and pursuing it passionately. He has a wonderful testimony and I am looking forward to seeing the amazing things he is going to do in life.

Gareth’s drumming school.

Gareth is so humble and giving. Although people take advantage of this, it hasn’t turned this part of him off. He continues to be selfless in the way he treats people, always going the extra mile. He doesn’t seek recognition, but like all of us, he loves encouragement. I have known Gareth to sow into people’s’ lives with whatever he can, whether it be a gift or his time.

With my brothers, Gareth (left) and Nathan (right) – January 2016.

One of the things that I admire most about Gareth is his ability to speak and stand up for what is right. Even though there might be opposition to it, he isn’t afraid to say something. He is a great protector and hates being treated or others being treated unfairly. I’m not saying he is perfect (no one is) – but he knows how to be on the side that is right, not the side that is popular. If Gareth is wrong, he will say so – just don’t rub it in his face or harp on the issue, you will be asking for trouble.

Celebrating Gareth’s 21st birthday.

Gareth is bold, passionate and an awesome example of someone who hasn’t given up! He is an inspiration to me when I feel like giving up – I look to him and am reminded that failing isn’t the end, if you get up, it can be a step to reaching the goal and a powerful moment to learn. My family would not be the same without him – it would be quite boring (sorry to the rest of my family) without him. I am so grateful that God decided Gareth would be the one to be my first sibling and make me a sister. I love him and miss him so much!

One down and four blogs left to go. I got to do one for each family member, else they will think I’m showing favouritism – and that doesn’t go down well amongst us!

❤️ Taryn (the eldest)

 

A Daughter’s Hero

Today the world turns its attention onto fathers. Any man can physically father a child but it takes courage to be present and raise that child. Today we celebrate the men who have taken up the responsibility to be a present father in a child’s life – whether they are biologically yours or not, to the single parents who are making it work – today we celebrate you.

To all dads out there, perfection isn’t the point. Love is. As much as correction and instruction are a part of the process it isn’t only about the “do’s” or “do nots”.  It is about keeping your word. It is about that hug or encouraging word. It is about sitting down with us in the down moments and just being there. It is about celebrating the victories, no matter how small or insignificant they seem. It is about living a life which is an example of who you want us to be. It is about saying sorry when you’re wrong and showing us how to do it better. It is spending time with us, those 5 minutes of your undivided attention means more that any gift. You see, no matter a child’s age, your love is the ‘approval stamp’ in their life. No gift will ever make up for lost time or absenteeism. Maybe you didn’t grow up with this example, but it’s worth the effort. I have seen many children’s lives – both positively and negatively impacted by the presence of an actively involved parent or lack there of.

I have had the privilege of having my dad actively involved in my life – from birth right up to this point. In fact I am blessed to come from a home where both my parents are present and involved. But today I want to share about my dad.

My dad is awesome and I was pretty heart-broken upon finding out that I coulnd’t marry him (I was about 5 or 6 years old). My dad is a pastor, mentor and founder of many wonderful life changing things and has an impact in many lives but most importantly he is a dad. He has one beautiful wife and four amazing kids (I’m biased on both counts).

Here are a fews things about him:

  1. My earliest memories of my dad are on a building site. I must have been about 2 years old. This building site is now the church and school’s main auditorium. I remember my mom taking me to see my dad. My dad used to let me get in the trenches with him and at that time a 2m deep trench seemed like a hole to the middle of the earth. He was there day in and day out buidling the church. This is the man I know – hard working and always willing to get involved to make it happen. Throughout the years that I was at home, my dad has always been very hands on and right up there working on all our projects and sometimes harder than the young men working with him.
  2. My dad loves to read. He has hundreds of books, both hard copies and electronic copies. He has a shelf or two dedicated to all his Bibles. I get my love of reading from him. He is always reading and growing his knowledge of things both on secular and spiritual issues. My dad has a passion for empowering young people with knowledge and even at this stage in his life he is teaching subjects in the school.
  3. My dad loves Jesus, His Word and prayer. I remember many mornings where the sound of him praying would be what I woke up to. I loved to crawl behind the couch in the lounge and listen to him pray. Eventually I got caught and so he would let me sit or lie on his lap while the early morning prayer meetings would happen in our house. My dad writes out Proverbs and other scriptures regularly and this is part of his method in studying the Bible. He is my inspiration when it comes to growing spiritually.
  4. One of the fondest memories I have is of the many times my dad and I would collect sea shells as we walked on the beach early in the mornings while on holiday. It became our special time.
  5. My dad prayed me through many tough times. I remeber there was a stage where I had major panic attacks and nightmares. My dad would walk up and down the passsage and pray and when my mom had gotten tired, he would let her go sleep. He would then sit on the edge of my bed or on the floor with me and pray until I was sleeping peacefully. Once I remember being rushed to the ER with spasms and excruciating abdominal pains. I saw the look in my dad’s eyes and knew I was in trouble because for a brief moment – I saw fear in his them. That moment passed so quickly as my dad loaded me in the car and prayed (in such a calm, yet authorative manner) that by the time the doctor came, I had fallen asleep peacefully.
  6. I hate being the center of attention. Out of all my siblings, I am the least outgoing in large groups of people. On my wedding day, I knew this would be just a slight challenge as one of the things I would be doing was walking down the aisle (and of course EVERYONE would be looking at me). As we got ready to walk down the aisle, I started to panic just a little bit. About half way down the aisle, I asked my dad to stop. My legs had become so shaky, I was struggling to take steps. My dad calmly started to pray. He prayed me down the aisle. It was such a special moment. It pretty much sums up my dad to me. He is a pillar in my life.

My favourite walk with my day – my wedding day. 21 February 2015


I am so proud to have a dad like I do – a true example of a Godly man. There are many sacrifices that he has made so that my siblings and I (along with all the other lives he has touched) can be where we are today. It was a privildge to serve him in both the school and in ministry before I got married and moved.  I love him so much and he will always be a hero in my eyes.

Happy Father’s Day to my hero!

If your dad or the person who has fathered you is alive, I hope you thanked them today for being there!

Have a wonderful Sunday and may this new week be filled with many great successes.

From my heart to yours

Taryn

My dad baptising me.

My dad & I during our family photoshoot in 2014.

First day in Grade 1.

Backrides as kids – Gareth & I.

Ministry tour trip in Nigeria.

My dad and I on my 16th birthday.


 

 

With This Ring {Our Engagement Story}

Two years ago today, I was in a car on my way to see Jeremy and his family in Durban. I didn’t know the when or where of the get together. I just knew I was going to get to see my Jeremy.I knew from the first time I visited Jeremy, that he would one day become my husband. I knew he was going to ask me to marry him, I just wasn’t sure of the how and when. All I knew was that I was going to say yes.

Our journey to our engagement and wedding was not an easy one. A year prior to our engagement, Jeremy and I went through a very heartbreaking experience that nearly tore us apart. We allowed people and their opinions to overcome us. When we first wanted to get engaged, it was met with great opposition. We had done everything right, and still everything that could go wrong, went wrong and at the end of it, we were two very hurt young people. We chose to let the horrible experience go and press on to what we felt was right for us and our lives. We allowed each other some time to heal and get back to a good place as a individuals as we worked on our own relationship. Jeremy had expressed to me that he wanted to ask me to marry him (again), although we had often joked that I should be the one asking him. So our families got together at my childhood holiday spot in Umdloti, Durban.

I was a ball of nerves the whole 3 hour drive from Ladysmith to Durban. My heart pounded. My hands were sweaty. I was wondering if my hair was looking good. Did I wear the right clothes and shoes? Would my make up still look fresh by the time we got to Durban? I could only imagine how my Jeremy was feeling. What made the nerves worse was the fact that Jeremy and I weren’t chatting as he was flying in to Durbs and so his phone was off. Anyone who knows me, knows I don’t like surprises. I like to know what I’m going in to. No one in family would tell me where we were going to meet the Liberty’s – it drove me nuts. I even tried asking our driver where he was supposed to take us – he just said he was to follow my dad’s car (we were travelling in two cars).

As we drove passed all the “spots” I thought we’d meet, I started to get really nervous. Finally I clicked that we were driving to Umdloti. I started to look around very carefully to see if I could see Jeremy  or his family – nothing. We drove into the parking lot which faced the ocean. I finally got a text from Jeremy which said, “Wait in the car”. Seriously? Wait in the car.

My family all made their way across the road to a restaurant. I watched them walk up the stairs to the top level – still no sight of Jeremy. I slowly got out the car and as I did, I was hit with a gust of wind. Immediately I thought, I’m wearing the wrong shoes (I had HIGH heeled boots on) and a dress. I turned around to try get my hair our of my face. As I looked up, I saw him. There was my handsome man  walking towards me. It felt like I was meeting him for the first time al over again. All I could do was smile broadly and hope my dress didn’t lift up in the wind when I hugged him.

As we came face to face, we just hugged. I could feel his heart beating through his clothes. I’m pretty sure he could feel mine too. There was a moment where we just looked at each other and then laughed. All the emotions and build up drifted away. It was just us. No one else mattered. He took my hand and asked me to walk with him. As we approached the beach, I started to laugh. How was I going to walk on the sand in these high heels? Jeremy held me around the waist and took me a few steps before he stopped and turned to face me.

This was the moment. I could tell he was nervous. This was a special moment for us. Finally we were moving forward to what we wanted. He pulled me closer, one hand around my waist, the other holding my hair out of my face (the wind was blowing really hard). He told me how much he loved me and how he wanted to have me in his life always. He took a step back and pulled out a little black box. He slowly opened it. The sun hit the ring and it sparkled brightly – it was so beautiful. He asked me if I would marry him. I said yes (of course) and then promptly shouted out (while doing a fist pump in the air) – IT’S ABOUT TIME! We both laughed and he placed the ring on my finger. We laughed, hugged and kissed. Slowly we made our way to the restaurant to celebrate with our families.

How we both appreciated reaching the moment where we could say we were engaged. It was a part of our dream that had come true. The long days and lonely nights, the long distance and many hours we had to spend on the phone were worth it. The joy of celebrating as we took a step in the right direction made everything we had been facing worth it.

I am so happy I met Jeremy and said yes to being his wife. My life has become a great adventure with him. I am 100% loved, accepted and supported by him. So glad he asked me to be his Mrs. Liberty!

True love exists. There is a right person for you. Don’t give up on finding your special person, instead focus on becoming the best you that you can be. They will appreciate it! Keep your true love dream alive.

From my heart to yours

Taryn